Friday, 4 April 2014

Very Interesting 17 Family Traditions Igbo Families Practiced In The Olden Days.

Please this is for educational purpose and only an extract from a work compiling old Igbo traditions. Feel free to criticize, correct or Add. This was compiled mostly through oral history/ accounts. Some of the practices, as controversial as they may be, varied from one Igbo community to another. Some have either been adulterated or simply faded away with the intervention of Christianity and western culture. This was first published by Mr. Godwin C Nwaogwugwu and shared here with permision. To make contributions please contact him directly through contacts on the imoonline.org website.

This work was an extract from a work compiled by Godwin C. Nwaogwugwu. Director/Founder Imoonline Youth Program, Owerri, Nigeria (A grantee of the United States Embassy Abuja, Nigeria)

1.
 Young ladies were decorated with dye called ‘Uli’ and ‘Uhie’ (both were from trees) beautiful body painting /art similar to what we call ‘Tatoos today to attract attention and suitors.

2. A grandma who wanted to match-make her grown grand-daughter with a man would send her on errand to the man’s family with a pot of water on her head filled to the brim so that water would pour on her body revealing her body figure/ shape to the intended man. This among others, was a dubious practice secretly perfected between two old women (childhood friends) who wanted to be in-laws.

3. Wearing a mini skirt was nothing new to the Igbo community as young ladies in the olden days usually dressed in one piece cloth tied on the chest level and usually was only able to cover the thighs of a young lady. Mini dresses were never considered indecent dressing in the olden Igbo culture.

4. A barren women could marry a ‘wife’ , Woman-to-woman Marriage (Nwunye-Nwanyi). The usually younger woman lived in the older woman’s house as a maid and not as a second wife to her husband. The woman could then permit her ‘wife’, to sleep with her husband and have children on her behalf. This was a very complicated arrangement as the woman’s wife actually had no title, and all the children she had belonged to her madam and not hers. She practically had no rights in the family.

5. In some olden Igbo communities a woman without a male child could arrange to have one of her daughters have an out-of-wedlock child hoping it could be a male child (this was not very popular) but actually happened. Outsiders might think the said daughter had an unwanted pregnancy while behind the scene her parents (usually her mother) encouraged her to have a son in the family before getting married. However, this usually resulted in problems when the boy became a man and called names by peers. 

6. The society kept their young girls pure before marriage by keeping young men away from the girls. They did that in a more realistic way by allowing young men who could not wait till marriage to have intimacy to keep young widows as mistresses called ‘Iko’. They could father children for the widows. However, any child born by a widow in her dead husband’s house still belonged to her husband’s family. ‘Iko’ (the boyfriend) had no claim or right to a child he fathered. This way young men were kept away from young unmarried maidens. 

7. The olden Igbo society really never held men responsible for adultery, as married men easily kept mistresses (Iko), while married women were not permitted to keep or sleep outside their marriage.

8. Marriage was a covenant between two families and not between two people. Marriage ceremonies were organized in stages. Stage one Ihe Ajuju (The Asking) – the man and his relatives went to the girl’s family to ask for her hand in marriage. Usually at this stage most discussions happened in parables ‘Ilu’ such that the bride-to-be might not even understand the intent of the visitors. Stage 2. Ekwelam (Response). The equivalence of the western engagement ceremonies. Final Stage 3: The wedding proper which many people refer to as ‘traditional wedding' today. It’s known by various names ‘Ibu Mmanya’‘Igba Nkwu’‘Alughum’, etc. This was the wedding proper when the bride price ‘Ihe Ego’ and gifts were presented to the bride’s family with fanfare and entertainment. The bride was expected to go home with her husband after this ceremony. 

9. A woman who gave birth to ten or more children without a caesarian session was honored by the community with an ‘Ewu-ukwu’ ceremony. She was a session of blessings by elderly women. She was honored and given a place of honor in the society. 

10. Generally, Africans including Igbos had many children in the olden days for three reasons. 1- Before vaccinations came to Africa, families lost kids to diseases. Therefore, having many kids was a way to safeguard losses in case some died prematurely. 2- Most activities such as farming were labor-intensive. Therefore, having more kids provided additional helping hands to a family. 3- Tribal wars were very rampant in the olden days. Families and communities relied on male children as soldiers to defend their land and women from invaders. Every man was considered a soldier. There were no standing armies. 

11. A man or woman who lived to see his /her great grandchildren was honored with an ‘Onyima Umu’ title ceremony. They wore beaded necklaces- Large beads represented the number of children they had, the medium beads represented the number of grandchildren, and small-sized beads represented the number of great-grandchildren. 

12. In the olden days a titled man was expected to pass two tests. ‘Ofor’ (to uphold self-respect) and ‘Ogu’ (to uphold honesty) Oaths.

13. Igbo society was a very male-dominated society. Unlike in Yoruba land, In Igbo land daughters actually had no inheritance in their fathers' house since they were expected to marry and assume their husband’s name and wealth. 

14. Masquerades called ‘Mmanwu’ were the local police that enforced law and order. They were usually young men of age who were initiated to swear oaths of secrecy never to revel who wore the masks. Wearing masks gave masquerades the courage to confront deviants without retribution. Masquerades also through entertaining songs/music acted as social critics and singing about ills in the society s and could revel secret deeds / abomination going on in the land. 

15. A man whose father and mother came from the some community was called ‘Nwa Diala’ (full-fledge). In the olden days only a ‘Nwa Diala’could be titled or crowned a community head 'Eze' or 'Igwe'.

16. In Igbo land, first daughter ‘Ada’ holds a very special respected position in the family and community. Families, for some reasons, protected and respected their first daughter more than any other child in the family. In fact, in most communities first daughters operated like a cult called‘Umu Ada’. The fear of ‘umua ada’ was the beginning of wisdom. Apart from wars over boundaries, kidnap, forcefully defiling, or sudden death of an Igbo first daughter (Ada) in another community were other major causes of community/ tribal wars. First daughter, Ada was the prestige of the family such that a father could actually pack to her married first daughter’s house in protest of bad behaviors or neglect by his sons. 

17. In sharing inheritance the first son inherits his father’s main house, ‘Obi’. It doesn’t matter how big the ‘obi’ is. It unequivocally belongs to him. In a polygamous society the first son is not the son of the first wife, rather the first male child born to the man irrespective of the position of his mother in the marriage.

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